One year older and wiser too!

I have been taking the last month to write all I can think about this last year and what Aleksandra means to me. It's so sad to say but I have cried this last month more then ten times, ever time I look at a picture when Aleksandra was younger I start to cry. I am out of control mike and I where watching a movie and it showed a newborn and once again I busted out into tears. Mike keeps asking if I am pregnant because I am so emotional but he doesn't get hard this is for a mom to watch her kid grow up so quick. I of course did not prepare myself for how fast Aleksandra would grow up and I have only myself to blame for feeling this way. Time to me has zoomed by and my heart and my emotions don't know if I am ready for aleksandra to turn one.

I remember ever monumental thing in her life that mike and I oeee and oooddd over a hundred times. Down to her first smile, her first laugh, her first roll, first tooth, first solid foods, first crawl, first kiss, her blessing day, and her first step. She has accomplished a lot in her first year and she is growing like a weed and can do so many fun things by herself. I have such independent baby, I find it funny how hard I work to make her independent and now that she is I want her to want me more and not be so independent. We go to play at the park and off she goes to the sand box or up the stairs and down the slide with out my help. Its just like for one moment I would like to remind her she needs me every step up the way and no possible can she make any substitute for that.

As I lay here thinking about the first day I help her in my arms and mike and I looked up at each other crying like babies I realized that forever my life would change and I couldn't be happier for this moment in my life. Then it was us three together our life as a family had begun and I wouldn't take it back for nothing. I remember holding her and thanking my heavenly father for a beautiful, healthy daughter who was about to change everything. I remember crying thinking how lucky I was to have here after 9 months and 6 days inside of me. I love looking back and thinking about the first day it is almost a dream how fast it all happened and how quickly our lives changed forever.

The first weeks home with baby were a blur, running off of no sleep and still tired from giving birth. It was fun for mike and I to work together and figure out how and what was supposed to happen. I remember mike looking at me and saying were we ready for this? And I in reply say "I don't think anything could of ever prepare us for being parents"! But now I know I would never take it back for the world.

Since Aleksandra was our surprise baby, plans had to be changed and altered but no matter the case I could be more happier with Aleksandra in our life. Nothing is better when that little girl looks up at me and smiles or let's a little giggle out. Nothing better then those 3 hour naps after she is so tired from playing all day. Nothing is better after bath time Aleksandra just loves to snuggle in bed and read a book. Nothing I mean nothing is better then Aleksandra as my daughter!

All I want aleksandra to know is how much she is loved by our family. How much we care and look after her physical and spiritual needs. I hope she knows that the way to happiness is your family and through family you always have shoulder to lean on through thick and thin we are always there for her.